Today was the day I had been trying not to think about too much. The day of leaving Thailand again.
We left early from the condo in Pattaya, heading towards Jomtien to catch the bus to Bangkok. The streets were still quiet, not fully awake yet, which somehow made everything feel even heavier. No rush, no noise, just the reality of what was coming.
Noi came with me to the airport. She didn’t have to, especially that early, but she did. It gave us a bit more time together, and that made a difference.
The bus ride to Bangkok was quiet. Not uncomfortable, just… quiet. We talked a bit, but there were also long moments where we both just looked outside. Watching the road, the small towns passing by, knowing every kilometer was bringing us closer to the moment we didn’t want.
Arriving at Suvarnabhumi Airport always feels different on departure days. Everything looks the same, but the feeling is not. You’re not arriving with excitement, you’re counting down the last minutes.
Saying goodbye never becomes normal. Even if you’ve done it before.
Standing there at the entrance to security, you know there’s a point where you just have to go. No way around it. No extra time.
Those last moments are always the hardest. You try to stay calm, say what you need to say, but at the same time, you know words don’t really cover it.
At one point, a British guy and his Thai wife started talking to us. Just a short conversation, but it helped. They understood the situation right away. That kind of connection, even with strangers, makes a difference in moments like that.
Eventually, it was time. No way to delay it anymore.
Walking up the escalator towards security, you feel the distance start immediately. You look back one more time, knowing it’s going to be a while before you see each other again.
The flight itself felt long, but also a bit unreal. Like your body is there, but your mind is still somewhere else.
Landing in Schiphol brought everything back quickly. The pace, the structure, the cold feeling of everything moving fast again. It’s a big contrast with Thailand.
Walking out of the airport, it hits you. Not just missing a place, but missing a feeling. The calm, the simplicity, the way life feels there.
Back in the Netherlands, everything is familiar, but it doesn’t feel the same.
Still, this is part of it. The distance, the travel, the goodbyes. It’s not easy, but it’s temporary.
And that’s what matters.
